Contradiction

Long ago, in ancient China (so I'm told), there was a man who had a weapons shop, probably located on Weapons Street, where he sold such useful things as knives, swords, spears, shields, helmets, soft drinks, Wrigley's gum, and packaged chicken's feet. This weapons seller claimed that his spears were the sharpest spears in the world and that his spears could pierce through any armor. I'm sure he even offered a discount to the local warlord if he bought his spears in bulk--cheap-ah, cheap-ah for you friend-ah! At the same time, this black smith/weaponeer/arms dealer (what do you call a person who makes/sells weapons? Dad, help me out!) also claimed that his shield was the best in all of China . . . no! . . . in all of the world! . . . and that absolutely nothing could pierce his shield. But wait there's more! . . . if you buy one impenetrable shield and one ultra-sharp spear within the next 30 seconds, you'll receive not one, but two!, retro Roman-style broom-top helmets absolutely free (doubles as a Dustbuster during peacetime)!!! So, after listening to this arms seller's sales pitch one-too-many times, some clever customer asked the man what would happen if he used the able-to-pierce-anything spear against the impenetrable shield. The shop seller realized he was in a bit of a conundrum. If he said his spear was strong enough to pierce the shield, he would be admitting that his shield was not-so-impenetrable. If he said that the shield could stand up to a stab from the spear, then obviously he was admitting that the spear wasn't quite as sharp as he was advertising. I guess false advertising has had a long history here in China . . .

And so today, the Chinese word "contradiction" is made up of two characters. The first one is 矛 (máo) which is the word for "spear." And the second character 盾 (dùn) which is the word for shield.

矛盾 máodùn has to be one of the most useful words I've learned in Chinese in a while, and it definitely wins the prize for Best Etymology. Obviously, I embellished the story a little, but that is (according to my Chinese teacher) the basic idea of how the word came about. Do we have any words like that in English that have come about because of some kind of historical story/fable? I can't think of any.

The entire country of China is one giant living, breathing contradiction. On a national scale, China is the most curious blend of despotic, Communistic politics and Western, capitalistic economics. Chinese toddlers are bundled up in layers and layers of clothing until they look like little walking marshmallows with heads; yet they have split-bottom pants on, leaving their little rear-ends exposed to the cold. Chinese people will push and shove to get on a bus without a second-thought for the people around them who they just elbowed; yet they'll welcome any guest into their home and put Westerners to shame with their hospitality and generosity. In China it's considered rude and dirty to touch food with your hands; however, it's common to see people picking their noses (maybe that's why they don't touch their food!). At 5 feet 5 inches, I feel like a giant compared to most of my Chinese friends; yet China can produce a 7 and a half foot NBA center. I've always thought I could write a book about China entitled "Contradictions" (or maybe a grad school paper in the future?) Now that I know the interesting history behind the word in Chinese, I'm even more interested in the topic.