One Child Thoughts

When I go back to the States, I often get asked about China's one-child policy. People ask me if Chinese families can really only have one child and if there is a strong preference for boys. I usually say that, yes, the policy is in effect and enforced; however, there are exceptions, especially for the rich (they pay the fines and bribes), the rural poor (they try to avoid being caught), and ethnic minority groups (the government wants to promote minorities in China so they're legally allowed more children). Regarding a preference for boys, I don't tend to notice that among my students and friends. I have just as many girls in my classes as boys. In fact, my classes usually have a majority of girls (language, music, and art majors tend to be girls, while boys tend to excel more in, or are steered toward, math and science). Chinese couples that I know who give birth to a daughter seem just as happy and excited and loving towards their daughters as the couples who have boys. And, especially in the cities, most Chinese people genuinely seem to think that one child is enough. They tend to think that with the costs of housing and education, more than one child would be more than they could afford (granted, that perspective may be propaganda-induced)

Every once in a while, however, I run into situations that remind me that there are other sides to the one-child policy and those negative stories that we hear in America about abandonment, forced abortions, and a dislike for daughters, while probably not the norm, are true. At the orphanage I volunteer at, the negative side of the one-child policy seems to play out on a small scale. The only boys at the orphanage are disabled, either mentally or physically. The five healthy infants and two healthy toddlers that are currently at the orphanage are all girls, along with two older healthy girls. Two days ago, I was talking to a former student and she began to share some of her family background with me. Her parents already had a daughter, her older sister, but wanted a son. They decided to risk it and had another baby (my student). Because she was a girl, she was "hidden" by being sent to be raised by her grandparents for a time. My student's parents then had a third child which was a boy. In the end though, my student's father lost his job as a government worker and ended up working in real estate/construction. (Tragically, my student's brother died as a teenager from an illness that wasn't supposed to be fatal. Her father still hasn't recovered from the loss of the son.) This same student told me that she has a cousin who, in an attempt to have a son and gain control and status in the family, has given up two daughters.

Since I now live in a more rural location and the students I teach now are mostly from villages and the countryside, I bet if I could get them to talk candidly, I would hear more stories like my student from Yichang told me. I've read countless books about China with scores of stories like my student's. That kind of behavior is still atypical, but not unheard of.

The most common complaint I hear from Chinese students about their country is about the population--"There are too many people." Too many people want to get into universities and graduate schools. Too many people make jobs scarce. Too many people make travel impossible during holidays. Too many people make housing hard to find. Too many people . . .

I don't know what kind of humane, plausible solution you come up with to deal with overpopulation, but I know that when people are giving away babies, something's not right.

Smell Your Soap

As a follow-up to my toothpaste sampling post . . .

Yesterday I was at the same grocery store and I noticed that in the soap aisle they had a bar of every kind of soap out and setting on a little soap dish on the shelves! Again, there's no sink, so I can't actually sample the soap to see how well it washes my hands. I guess it's all about being able to choose the scent you want. As with my thoughts on the toothpaste, nice gesture on the store's part I suppose, but it's still funny and slightly odd. Not to mention, a rather big waste of soap.

Sadly, I didn't get a picture of the soap aisle because there were too many workers around (if you've ever been to a Chinese supermarket, you completely understand that) and they don't like you taking pictures in the store.

Maybe this trend will catch on to the other aisles and they'll start offering samples of all the different kinds of food and snacks they sell too. I would find it useful to be able to sample all the different flavors of chips or cookies (especially since they have some weird flavors here) before I buy them.

Study Girls

Katie and me with some of the girls who come over to our Book studies. These girls are really sweet and it's fun to share and study with them.

St. Patrick's Day

Last week, we celebrated St. Patrick's Day with a McGreen O'Dinner at the Rice's house. We had green and orange mandarin salad, spinach stuffing, potatoes (of course), cucumbers, asparagus. For dessert - Rachel's Over-the-Rainbow cake, shamrock cut-out cookies, scones and a pot of (chocolate) gold (do you think we had enough dessert?). Fun times and lots of green!

Which came first, the chicken or the duck egg?

After the winter vacation, Matthew (one of our student-friends) was really thoughtful and brought fresh eggs for me, Katie, Dave and the Rice family all the way from his village. The eggs were wrapped up and tied together with straw to make a great homemade egg carton. We realized after we got them that they were duck eggs, not chicken eggs. At first I was a little unsure about using duck eggs instead of chicken eggs, but it turns out they're pretty much interchangeable. Victoria even made deviled eggs out of the duck eggs and none of us could taste the difference. We did notice that the shells were much harder to crack and that the yolks were bright orange and slightly bigger. We ended up using them in scrambled eggs, cookies, scones, deviled eggs, and boiling them to put in tuna salad. Never expected I'd be cooking with duck eggs.

Bowling

We found a bowling alley in Mengzi. Five lanes hidden away on the third floor of a hotel! We were the only customers (yeah for no smoking or that funky "bowling alley" smell that permeates your clothes when you bowl in the States). Fun Saturday afternoon activity!

Two Boxes in Two Days!

Yesterday I got a package from Beth!! So happy! Beth sent me a necklace she made herself which was green for St. Patrick's Day and I got the package exactly on St. Patrick's Day--perfect timing. I wore my new green necklace last night to our St. Pat's McGreen O'Party at the Rice's house! Beth also sent me a box of peppermint Peeps--so funny (long story) :) And, I got letters from all of Beth's 4th grade ESL students that she teaches in Nashville, TN. The letters are super sweet and cute. I think I'm going to try to have some of my students write back to these kids (I teach a practical writing class so I think that sounds like a perfect project!). Thanks so much for thinking about me Beth!

Then today, Katie picked up a package for me while she was in the International Affairs Office. Two packages in two days, quite exciting! Today's box was from Ruby who's my church grandma. She's one of the most thoughtful people I know and I was surprised and happy to see a box from her. When I opened the box I found a fall candle, some candied pecans in a pumpkin bag, and a birthday card! My birthday is in November!! I looked more closely at the label on the box and saw that Ruby had sent me the box at the end of October! What in the world. It took more than 5 months to get here?! Seriously sometimes I think the mail in Mengzi must be some of the slowest in the world! I feel like we still use the Pony Express here. But, ironically, the last box I got from my parents arrived in only about 9 days which is quite speedy. I don't get it. I wonder if Ruby's box was just sitting somewhere on campus all this time and either no one knew who to give it too or else they just didn't bother to contact me to tell me I had a package. So even though the pecans are sadly too old to enjoy, I'm enjoying my scented candle right now and am still happy to get the package even though it wins the prize for my most delayed box ever.

*As a side note, last January while in India, Katie, Beth, Brad and I sent a postcard to Amy. It arrived in Yichang over ONE YEAR later, just a few days after Amy had left Yichang to return to America! I don't know exactly how, but I did hear that Amy's postcard finally made it to her in America just a few days ago! :) Seriously, where was it all this time?! I wonder if the problem was with the Indian Postal system or with China Post?